From summer 2003 to October 2005, I lived in Pocatello, ID. Pocatello is a moderate size town, about 60,000 people, maybe 80,000 if you count the contiguous town of Chubbock. It is certainly not a military town. The 1-148 Field Artillery Battalion was headquartered there, and that's where I worked. Counting our little regular Army contingent and the active Guard guys, there were maybe a dozen people in Pocatello who wore "green suits" to work every day. On drill weekends, the number went up to about 120.
In 2004, Jeni had a sudden onset of appendicitis and had an appendectomy. She spent a couple of days in the hospital and I spent much of those days with her. During the time I was at the hospital, I left the dogs, Bob and Belle, outside. They didn't like that and they made some noise - and some neighbor complained. One day, during that time, an animal enforcement officer came by and told me there had been a complaint. I explained the situation and he gave me a warning ticket.
In 2004, the 1-148 mobilized and we (the active guys) went to Ft. Bliss to help them train for their deployment. While I was gone, Jeni went to Washington for a week to visit her parents and arranged for the wife of one of the guys who was with me to come by and let the dogs go out to potty while she was gone. Unfortunately, the dog sitter got called to jury duty and she had no choice but to come by and let the dogs out all day. You can guess what happened.
I got to come home for a week in September 2004, and while I was home another animal control officer came by and said he needed someone to sign for a citation. I said I'd sign for it. He said that I would have to go to court. I said that it better be quick, because I was leaving Saturday (I believe this was Tuesday). He told me he could schedule me for Thursday, and as a bonus, there was a friendly judge on Thursday.
So Thursday came around. I'd never been to court, so I wasn't sure what to do or what the procedures were. I dressed "business casual"; khaki's and collared shirt. We learned, on the fly, that you go down to the clerks office and tell them what you intent to plea. If you want to plea innocent, they get you hooked up with a public defender. If you want to plea guilty, you just sit on the bench until court starts. I didn't know how else I could plea, so I told them I'd plea guilty.
We went into the courtroom with everyone else and, as it turned out, I was third up. The guy in front of me (wearing a t-shirt and cut-off shorts), was a truck driver who had passed a weigh station without stopping. He plead guilty and told the judge how he'd just had a brain fart because the weigh station is usually closed and he just didn't expect to stop. He went on to say that he immediately pulled over for the pursuit cars and his load was 100% legal. He also went on to say how he's just a poor truck driver and he couldn't afford to pay a big fine. The judge told him to calm down, he hadn't ruled yet. However, court cost is $65 and that is set by the state legislature so he couldn't do anything about that. The judge was sympathetic and fined the truck driver $5 - total bill $70. That gave me hope.
When I was called, I approached the bench, and the judge asked me my name and address. He then said, "you're charged with 'having an unruly animal' (or something to that effect). The maximum fine for this offense is $200." Doing the math, I knew that's really $265. That would definatly not be pleasant, but we could live with it. He then asked, "How do you plea." I said, "It's my dog, so guilty."
He asked me if I had any matters for consideration. I said, "Well your honor, its my dog, but I wasn't even here. I was at Ft. Bliss and my wife went to Seattle and our dog sitter got called to jury duty, etc.". The judge replied, "you were at Ft. Bliss?" I said, "yes sir, and I'm going back Saturday." He asked, "are you in the Guard?" I said, "No, I'm active duty. We do training support for the Guard unit here in town."
He then asked me if I knew Private Brower. I said "PVT Cody Brower?" He said, "Yes. How's he doing?" Now, I didn't personally know Cody Brower. We had these spreadsheets that listed every soldier in the battery we were responsible for on one axis and every training event they had to complete on the other. Every day, we had to turn in that spreadsheet with an updated status on every training event completed by every soldier. Cody was in the unit I was responsible for, so I saw his name every day and I could easily recall his name, just like the other 120 or so soldiers I was responsible for training.
I said something like, "Sir, they're all doing great. We're all real proud of how well they're doing". He said, "I didn't ask you how they are all doing, I asked you about PVT Bower. You see, he's my son and since you do training support, I figure you should know." If I hadn't already figured out the right response, there was an old guy behind me, who was some officer of the court, wearing a VFW cap, whispering, "he's doing fine, he's doing great". I said something like, "he's doing great. He's meeting all training requirements and getting all the training he needs that will help him over there."
We then talked a little about the training they were getting. He mentioned that Cody had talked about the combat lifesaver training. I said, "yes sir. We all pray they won't need it, but if they do, that training will save lives." He then asked me if I had anything additional to say. I said no. He asked if we had arrangements made if Jeni had to leave again while I was away. I assured him we did. We'd researched kennels and had a plan to kennel the dogs if it became necessary.
He then pronounced his judgement. He said, "Well, you're in the Army, so you don't make a lot of money, do you?" I wasn't about to tell him that a Captain does pretty good, so I just said, "No sir." He went on, "So I will rule that you are indigent and, therefore, I can waive the court cost. I fine you $1. Can you pay today?" I said yes (of course and with a big smile). He then told me to go back to Bliss and tell his son, and all the soldiers, that "we all support them and we're praying for them."
After shaking some hands in the courtroom, I went outside to pay my $1 fine.
Now I haven't stationed in an "Army town" since 2003, but I can say with absolute certainty that when I was in Hinesville, GA, circa 1997, a similar case would have cost me $265. I love the heartland of America!
As an epilogue: A couple of years ago, I was upgrading my security clearance. I had to answer a questionnaire that asks everything you can imagine about your life. One of the questions asks if you've ever been convicted of, or plead guilty to, a crime, even a misdemeanor. Since I'm still not sure how this might be recorded in the public records, I said yes and provided all the details. As part of the investigation, you have to sit with an investigator and review all your answers. We got to that one and she started asking me all kinds of questions about my criminal behavior. Stuff like "how would you characterize the frequency of your criminal behavior?" She understood, but said that because I'd answered yes, she had to ask. Her final question was, "Do you still associate with any of your criminal associates." I said, "I still own the dog." She laughed and said she was writing that one down and hoping the folks at HQ had a sense of humor! I got the clearance.
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